Three Principles of Handling Criticism-1

Three Principles of Handling Criticism-1

Our mind looks upon criticism as intrusion. This is the truth. Especially when negative feedback from the other end is unsolicited. Often, the seed of hostility in any relationship sprouts when criticism, which is inevitable, is either expressed or processed unkindly. Thereafter, even constructive feedback is rejected as a biased opinion of the other person. “Criticism may not be agreeable, but it is necessary. It fulfills the same function as pain in the human body. It calls attention to an unhealthy state of things.” These are the words of Winston Churchill beautifully summing up how one should look upon criticism. Nevertheless, to be open to criticism remains a rare quality only few possess.

Numerous times, I’ve observed that people ask you for honest feedback, stressing the word honest, but when you actually do offer it, they become defensive. But, criticism is an important aspect of our lives and we can only gain from learning how to take it positively. Those who learn to handle criticism with discernment live in less conflict and command more respect wherever they go. Although I have written on it in the past, allow me to share my views in a different light today. Here are three golden principles of being at peace in the face of criticism. Next time you have to handle disapproval, justified or otherwise, reflect on these principles and you will remain mostly unperturbed.

Is it beneficial?

Often when we are criticized, ego raises its hood and most of us become defensive even before fully listening to what the other person has to say. We tend to believe that we know absolutely everything about us and that we know what we are doing. And anytime we are challenged, it shakes our self-belief, it rattles us. Some people react sharply and some withdraw, but the best thing to do is to ask yourself this question: is it beneficial? When their criticism or advice, however unsought or negative, is actually for your benefit, it is only prudent to pay attention to it. See, we have to remember that life is very short. There isn’t enough time for love, then why do we go around spreading hatred and bloodshed? This is a question we all have to ask ourselves. This is what will create a new world around us, where everyone will be free to follow their own religion and be in harmony with all others. You don’t have to take their feedback personally; simply listen to it and once done, mull over it and decide if there’s merit in it. You can then make a conscious choice of accepting or rejecting their views. This approach allows you to handle criticism in a non-violent way, without feeling bad.

Om Namah Shivay