The Art of Criticism-2
The result is that the offender accepts the criticism without feeling diminished, we as manager have performed our job with no unpleasant after taste, and the problem has been addressed.
The first wad of praise is the top slice of bread in the sandwich, and the last layer of praise is the bottom slice. The criticism is the filling. Thus it’s call the “sandwich method.”
The sandwich method is not a clever way or a cunning style of using your words. Instead, it has some great positives. It forces you to reflect on the goodness of the other person. It makes you think about what all they do “do right” before you feel bad or negative about what they do wrong. It helps you put things in a perspective.
Be careful if you only have negative things to say about someone. Chances are, what you have is not criticism (and certainly not constructive criticism) but frustration you may be venting out. Expressing such frustration will only do more damage than good. You end up engaging in violent thoughts or speech. Neither of which befit a spiritual person. At any rate, a patronizing advice, especially unsolicited, is almost always going to be rejected. Besides, often the other person has his or her own reasons to do what they do in the manner that they do so.
During a team dinner in an IT company, a smartypants programmer said to his peer who was holding his fork in the wrong hand, “Excuse me, but, just wanted to tell you that knife comes in the right hand and fork in the left.”
“What if I’m left handed?” his colleague replied and went about eating his meal.
This was 17 years ago in Sydney and I was the programmer who had offered the advice. I chewed my next bite softly with my own words and learned a lifelong lesson: don’t offer unsolicited advice.
Om Namah Shivay
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