How to handle disappointment?-1
How to Deal with Disappointments in Your Life
Disappointments can be quite agonizing, irrespective of their enormity. We all go through disappointment: troubled relations, unfair appraisals, loss of a beloved, health issues, social rebuffs etc. When I survey my own life, I realize I'm no different. However, I have learnt to accept that these things are unavoidable no matter how hard we try. Without disappointment and the teaching it recommends, how will we ever grow as a person?
Disappointments can be quite agonizing, irrespective of their enormity. We all go through disappointment: troubled relations, unfair appraisals, loss of a beloved, health issues, social rebuffs etc. When I survey my own life, I realize I'm no different. However, I have learnt to accept that these things are unavoidable no matter how hard we try. Without disappointment and the teaching it recommends, how will we ever grow as a person?
Here's how to respond to Disappointment
Disappointments are tough to deal with but unfortunately we don’t have much of an option since we can’t stop them from happening. The best way to deal with disappointment is to acknowledge and work through the feelings it induces. Here are a few tips that will help you deal with your disappointments in a much effective manner…
Disappointments are tough to deal with but unfortunately we don’t have much of an option since we can’t stop them from happening. The best way to deal with disappointment is to acknowledge and work through the feelings it induces. Here are a few tips that will help you deal with your disappointments in a much effective manner…
Scream it out
Kids throw tantrums, cry and scream until their frustration is over and they are actually ready to move on. Whatever you are feeling is OK. Take some time to just sit with your emotion and experience it without moving to fix or change it. Genuinely experiencing emotions, no matter how painful, will help. This will help you understand the whole thing better and at the same time this will make your brain create a defensive strategy.
Kids throw tantrums, cry and scream until their frustration is over and they are actually ready to move on. Whatever you are feeling is OK. Take some time to just sit with your emotion and experience it without moving to fix or change it. Genuinely experiencing emotions, no matter how painful, will help. This will help you understand the whole thing better and at the same time this will make your brain create a defensive strategy.
Learn from your defeats
Disappointment and failure build character and patience, when allowed to do so. They can teach you to win and lose with grace, an increasingly lost art these days.
Disappointment and failure build character and patience, when allowed to do so. They can teach you to win and lose with grace, an increasingly lost art these days.
Know that Disappointment is not unique to you
Everyone has been disappointed at some point in their life. Instead of beating yourself up, think about what you could have been done differently and always, always, always learn from the experience.
Everyone has been disappointed at some point in their life. Instead of beating yourself up, think about what you could have been done differently and always, always, always learn from the experience.
Make friends
God often ministers to our hurts through other people. It can be tempting to put up walls when you're feeling especially vulnerable, but if you shut out friends, you could be sealing off healing and hope.
God often ministers to our hurts through other people. It can be tempting to put up walls when you're feeling especially vulnerable, but if you shut out friends, you could be sealing off healing and hope.
Don’t take it personally
We say that we deserved it, or attracted it to ourselves or were not “good enough” to have a different outcome. The reality is - life will simply do what it does, whether you are there or not. In this instance, you happened to be present during the event, which actually had nothing to do with you. When you take something personally, it unnecessarily narrows your point of view. Instead of making it “all about me,” allow yourself to “not know”.
We say that we deserved it, or attracted it to ourselves or were not “good enough” to have a different outcome. The reality is - life will simply do what it does, whether you are there or not. In this instance, you happened to be present during the event, which actually had nothing to do with you. When you take something personally, it unnecessarily narrows your point of view. Instead of making it “all about me,” allow yourself to “not know”.
Keep the expectations under control
When you take a good look at your expectations, you will be getting closer to a true understanding of the event. Perhaps your expectations were unrealistic. Perhaps they could be adjusted a little to cope with this new reality. Either way, now is the time to question whether these expectations actually serve you.
When you take a good look at your expectations, you will be getting closer to a true understanding of the event. Perhaps your expectations were unrealistic. Perhaps they could be adjusted a little to cope with this new reality. Either way, now is the time to question whether these expectations actually serve you.
Look at the bigger picture
The ability to self-reflect is the essence of good mental health. Take some time to explore what is happening for you around this event – what it means to you and what it has taught you about life. It can help you recover, reevaluate, gain insight and clarity that will surprise you and make you feel better.
The ability to self-reflect is the essence of good mental health. Take some time to explore what is happening for you around this event – what it means to you and what it has taught you about life. It can help you recover, reevaluate, gain insight and clarity that will surprise you and make you feel better.
Evaluate what can you change
See if there's something you can change. If you're unhappy with something, the first thing you should do is try to change it. Sometimes the initial sting of a disappointment makes us feel helpless, but on closer inspection we might find that there is, in fact, something we can do to prevent or lessen the disappointment.
See if there's something you can change. If you're unhappy with something, the first thing you should do is try to change it. Sometimes the initial sting of a disappointment makes us feel helpless, but on closer inspection we might find that there is, in fact, something we can do to prevent or lessen the disappointment.
Om Namah Shivay
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